Words have more power than we sometimes realize. It’s important to choose them carefully; especially for formal occasions like weddings. Not just for speeches or toasts either — the way you word your wedding invitations can also affect the feelings of friends & loved ones. For instance, while it’s no secret that most guests expect to give a gift to the newlyweds, mentioning them in your invite can still be perceived as poor taste. It all comes down to proper wedding gift list wording.
Read on for useful (and usable) examples of gift list wording, as well as a few answers to some commonly asked questions of soon-to-be brides. With a little bit of research, you’ll be able to enjoy the beauty of your wedding day knowing your gift etiquette game is on point.
1. Can I Include a Gift Registry in My Wedding Invitation?
According to the American Express Spending and Saving Tracker, many wedding guests (around 37 percent) give a gift from a registry. Therefore, it’s helpful to guests to know where you’re registered. However, it’s still not accepted practice to include that information on the wedding invitation. Instead, many people include it on the bridal shower invitation, since the bridal shower is typically planned by somebody besides the bride (or groom). This way, it doesn’t appear that the bride herself is demanding the gift.
If you’re falling short on useful wedding gift ideas, you could ask for people to donate to your honeymoon fund!
Still, it’s your wedding, so you have the final word on what gets written in the invitation. If your wedding is unorthodox and your crowd is low-key, you may decide to include registry info on a separate paper within the invitation. Match your wording to the tenor of the rest of the invitation. Ideas include:
- “Your attendance at our wedding is a priceless gift. Additionally, if you’d like to honor us with a present, we are registered at {store}.”
- “The happy couple is registered at {store}.”
- “We’ve registered at {store} to make it convenient for you if you’d like to honor us with a wedding gift.”
If you’re not comfortable providing this information because it seems like you’re demanding gifts, rest assured that guests will likely just ask you, family members or members of your wedding party where you have registered.
2. Can I Ask for Money or Set Up a Crowdsourcing Site for My Wedding?
The idea of directly asking for money is a controversial one, even as the use of crowdfunding sites such as GoFundMe and Wanderable to help pay for weddings and honeymoons grows in popularity. While crowdsourcing seems a little less offensive when the wedding is non-traditional or very casual, it’s still likely to offend the more traditional-minded guests. The best rule of thumb is to know your crowd.
Guests who don’t buy items off a registry do tend to give cash (31 percent of them, according to the American Express Tracker), so if you’d rather have cash, you might simply consider not having a registry.
3. What If I Don’t Receive a Gift From a Guest?
While it is customary for a guest to send something from the registry to the listed address — most often before the wedding — some guests may still wait until after the big day. Proper wedding gift etiquette dictates that guests should send the selected item (or money contribution) about two months prior to the reception. However, there is still a chance you’ll have guests that don’t end up sending anything.
While there’s almost no tactful way to ask a guest why they didn’t buy a gift, you should still send them a thank-you note for attending your special day. Perhaps when they read your note that thanks them for attending your wedding but doesn’t thank them specifically for their contribution, they’ll remember to mail something your way.
At the end of the day, your wedding is an experience you’ll remember fondly forever. Try not to worry about guests who didn’t bring a gift.
4. How Long Do I Have to Send a Thank-You Note for a Gift?
Speaking of thank-you notes, you should really send yours within three months of receiving the gift. While many people still believe they have a year to get these done, in this age of instant communication (and gratification), it can be frustrating to the attendees to receive a thank you so long after giving the gift.
Do you have any other tips for wording a gift list? Do you have any comments, ideas, or suggestions? If you do, we’d love to hear them! Also, drop by our Facebook and Pinterest pages for additional wedding inspo and fun!
